Dr. B's Blog

Self-confidence is one’s assessment of their own self-worth, and it is what allows you to take risks. As a self-confident person, I know if something goes wrong, my good self-confidence will help me make things right. Self-confidence is based in reality rather than as “pie-in-the-sky” or wishful thinking. A track record of success and accomplishment breeds more confidence, therefore, being prepared, having sound knowledge, wisdom and realistic expectations are the building blocks for developing self-confidence.  

So how does one go about increasing self-confidence? First, keep in mind, like most measures that lead to genuine change, personal mastery and increasing self-confidence is a process. You cannot be inconsistent or impatient. One way to begin the process is by asking and answering the following questions: 

• What do you like about yourself?
  • Positive self image is a reflection of the mental picture one has of oneself. Self-image may be defined by what is “real” and what is ideal.
  • It always seems easier to express what you don’t like about yourself before you share what you do like. Here are some suggestions: Do you like your optimism, your high energy and enthusiasm? What about an ability to see the good before seeing the “not so good” in yourself and others? What is it you really like about yourself?
• What do you do well?
  • Everyone has gifts and talents – no exceptions. What you do well is generally associated with the compliments you receive from others.
• What do you value (may be understood by what you value about others)?
  • I value wisdom, kindness, compassion and helpfulness in others, and I appreciate those values in myself.
  • When you feel good about yourself, from where does the feeling come?
• Is your “feel good” dependent on other’s approval of you or does the good feeling come from somewhere within you? Are you giving away your power to others’ opinions of and reactions to you?
• What are your vulnerabilities?
  • Vulnerabilities could include having anger issues, having difficulty trusting, providing ineffective communication, demonstrating a lack of clarity on how to resolve conflict, displaying a lack of knowledge, being overly critical, being defensive, having a tendency to look for the negative versus seeing the positive, and creating perceived enemies and unresolved conflicts.

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Where is your level of self-confidence?

Dr. B

How is your self-confidence as you start into this new year? Do you know you need to take risks and make different choices? Self-confidence allows you to take risks you might not otherwise consider. In 2010, if you want something different in your life, then do something different with your life. Make 2010 work for you by being more self-confident.

What are some of your suggestions to others that may help them improve their self-confidence?

Succcessfully yours,

Dr. B